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Written Story Kalos Critique Lv.3 Teen Gijinka Showstoppers; an X/Y Gijinka Duallocke

See this resource for details on critique levels
Extravanganza Accordian Demo
Thread Description
Two very different Trainers compete in the glamorous and dramatic Kalos League; updates weekly
OP
llyarden

llyarden

Perpetual Lurker
Writer
Pokédex No.
169
Caught
Jun 30, 2019
Messages
309
Nature
Lonely
Pronouns
He/him
Pokémon Type
  1. Dark
  2. Dragon
There was just one Challenge left before they could move on to Ambrette and Cyllage.

And judging from the despondent looks from two of the groups who'd tried to beat it before Julian and Eurwen, it was going to be a rough one.

They stayed together rather than split up this time – not that they had much choice; unlike the previous caves, this time there was only one way to go.

The camera drones zooming past them to provide a dramatic shot of the four red-suited figures turning around in unison to face the two teams did somewhat give away that they were the major opponents.

One of the four stepped forwards, with a dramatic pose that Eurwen had to struggle to not laugh at. "Well, well, what do we have here? A nosy little trainer has come poking around."

The next one of the four stepped up with a pose of her own. "Listen up! We don't care one bit about what happens to other people or Pokemon!"

"Our goal is to make it so that we're the only ones who are happy!"

"We're gonna take everyone else down so we can do what we want!"

Now they all spoke in unison. "We're the fashionable team whose very name makes people tremble in fear!" The four took another step forwards, striking identical poses as they raised their voices. "Team Flare!"

Eurwen's amusement vanished.

"Time out!" One of the League adjudicators stepped forwards. "This battle will be against your four opponents simultaneously. Competitors, you may each select four Pokemon to use during the battle."

Eurwen barely even reacted to the announcement. Steph stepped forwards and put a hand on her shoulder. She could feel the Essence raging. "What is it?" she asked quietly.

Eurwen tilted her head to look at Steph. There was a hollowness in her eyes. "Mega Evolution. The Snorlax gatekeeper. I mean, sure, basically no-one knew about them. But this?" She gestured with one hand to the four red-suited Pokemon. "'Team Flare'? Everyone in Kanto is going to know that they're a parody. They're copying everything that happened in Kanto and turning it into…into a show."

Julian shifted uneasily, remembering what Trevor had mentioned, when they'd first met Eurwen. The turmoil in Kanto had involved some kind of powerful weapon. Just like the mysterious hints about a powerful weapon in the League's story.

Steph hugged Eurwen gently. "This is what they do," she said, quietly. "They take bad things that have happened in the real world and make them plot points. A few years ago, a tsunami hit Hoenn. The next year, the League story was about protecting Kalos from this made-up super-charged Water Pokemon."

"Why?!"

"It's always been controversial, but they've always kept doing it because…you get to be heroes in the League. I mean…" She paused for a moment, putting a hand on Eurwen's cheek. "Don't take this the wrong way, but…you couldn't stop what happened in Kanto, could you? You couldn't stop Giovanni."

Eurwen didn't say anything.

"But here…your character in the League can stop them."

Eurwen met her gaze for a long while. "Okay." She closed her eyes for a few moments, resting her head against Steph's, and Steph snuck a kiss in before backing off, making Eurwen smile. She took a deep breath. "Okay," she repeated quietly, before raising her voice and looking back to her team.

This wasn't like Kanto. She had her friends behind her here.

"Einar, Cyr, Cory, Kirstin." She gave an apologetic look to Miro and Lena, but the four she'd chosen covered each other well.

Julian had evidently gone for a similar idea, leaving out Sandra and Quacklin' – although Eurwen couldn't help but notice that Lisa looked a little nervous at the prospect of getting involved in what was clearly a difficult fight.

The sound of the countdown echoed through the artificial cave. Julian raised his Pokedex, waiting for the moment that the option to scan their opponents became available, peering over the holographic screen so he could watch the battle proper.

Fortunately, the first move the four Flare Pokemon did once the battle started was to strike another pose, which gave Julian the chance to look through his Pokedex. "Houndour, Zubat, Gulpin and Scraggy!" he reported.

"Cory, Kirstin, swap round." This wasn't a good fight for Cyr to be in, but she'd have to make do. At least he was already facing the Scraggy alongside Sam.

If Kirstin was surprised at being pulled away from a fight with a Fire-type, she was used enough to Eurwen's style of commanding to not question it, swapping with Cory as he came charging past with dragonfire burning in his eyes. "Now Confusion!"

She raised her hands – and the Gulpin man opened his mouth impossibly wide in a yawn, and she found herself stumbling, Essence fading away, and he grinned and tossed a ball of concentrated Poison Essence sideways at Cyr –

And Einar swiped it out of the air with burning claws, wincing as it splattered over him instead, and Cyr nodded his thanks and turned back to face the Scraggy, who ran at Sam and struck the Braixen with a powerful arm chop that left him stumbling before she got snagged in Cyr's vines and thrown back.

The Houndour man hadn't even tried to fight Cory – instead he'd backed off and gone after Lisa and Kamon instead, spitting horrible clouds of toxic smog over them. The battle was filled with the artificial flashes of transmitted Essence as Julian beamed Antidotes at the duo, but even with his Type advantage the Panpour couldn't match the Houndour's powerful attacks, and Julian frantically scrolling through the list of items he'd acquired until he found an X Defend and transmitted it to Kamon, trying to keep up with the moving battles and the Essence readouts on his Pokedex at the same time.

Cory circled around and went for the Zubat when the Poison-Type grew bat wings and tried to dive at Lisa, giving the Flabebe the freedom to move and send a spray of coruscating light at the Scraggy who was bound in Cyr's vines.

"Confusion!" Julian wasn't even sure who Eurwen was talking to until he noticed Kirstin shaking off the effects of the Gulpin's yawn and sending a Psychic wave at the Zubat as Cory knocked him off-balance. The Gulpin turned back to face her – and Artie nailed him with a Psybeam that blasted him halfway across the room.

That just left the Houndour, and though even with the X Defend Kamon had still barely been able to take him on, an eight-on-one battle was only going to end one way.

Julian breathed a sigh of relief as the last of the Houndour's Essence faded. Eurwen moved over to heal Einar with an Antidote before she got pulled aside by Steph.

"Feel better? Taking on the totally-not-…uh, whoever they were in reality?"

"Rocket. And…" Eurwen looked back at the Flare actors as they moved away – the Gulpin was rubbing his side where Artie's Psybeam had hit. A little smile flickered on her face for a moment. "Yeah. I guess I do."

Cyr - Quilladin, Male, Overgrow, Naive, Capable of Taking Hits
Miro - Butterfree, Male, Compound Eyes, Naughty, Sturdy Body
Kirstin - Psyduck, Female, Damp, Docile, Alert to Sounds
Lena - Skitty, Female, Cute Charm, Impish, Impetuous and Silly
Einar - Charmeleon, Male, Blaze, Hardy, A Little Quick Tempered
Cory - Axew, Male, Mold Breaker, Serious, Good Perserverance
Shaw - Bunnelby, Male, Pickup, Relaxed, Somewhat Vain
Sam - Braixen, Male, Blaze, Lonely, Likes to Thrash About
Artie - Vivillon, Female, Shield Dust, Modest, Sturdy Body
Kamon - Panpour, Male, Gluttony, Relaxed, Loves to Eat
Quacklin' - Farfetch'd, Male, Keen Eye, Jolly, Alert to Sounds
Sandra - Roselia, Female, Natural Cure, Brave, Proud of its Power
Lisa - Flabebe, Female, Flower Veil, Quirky, Strong Willed
Lola - Azumarill, Female, Thick Fat, Quiet, Somewhat Vain
 
OP
llyarden

llyarden

Perpetual Lurker
Writer
Pokédex No.
169
Caught
Jun 30, 2019
Messages
309
Nature
Lonely
Pronouns
He/him
Pokémon Type
  1. Dark
  2. Dragon
Chapter 7: Abrette and Cyllage

After the rough fight with the Flare actors, they were let out and given access to Ambrette and Cyllage. And even if it was staged and filmed to serve as a conclusion to the exploration through the 'cave network,' it was a relief for them to emerge from the fake cave, looking out through a clearing in the foliage over the seaside town.

"So what now?" Einar asked. "Between Cyllage and Ambrette there's a lot of challenges we can do now."

"Ooh, there's a flight contest!" Miro pointed out.

"Not right now," Eurwen interjected, before they got too excited. "We've been doing these challenges for almost a week, and even if they didn't take much Essence from you, those Essence regulators will have destabilised your Essence. Couple that with the fight we just had, and you could all use a day off."

"Wow, Eurwen giving us time off? What is the world coming to?" Cyr gave her an amused smirk, and she rolled her eyes at him.

"You're kidding, right?" Cory scoffed. "We're all fine." He looked around the group. "Or at least I'm fine."

Eurwen shrugged. "If you say so."

Cyr tried not to smile too much at the Axew's affronted expression.

Since they had access to both Cyllage and Ambrette now, they were allowed to stay in the Pokemon Centre in either city. As was the case with everything else in the League, there were coaches between the two cities that would make it easy to get to challenges in either. They ended up splitting up, some of them heading to Cyllage to spend their time in the bigger city, some staying in Ambrette. Cyr made a point of checking where Cory was going, so that once he knew the Axew was staying in Cyllage, he (and by extension Einar) could stay in Ambrette instead.

However arrogant Cory might have been about how he was fine – if he'd even been telling the truth – Kirstin had to admit, once the adrenaline of the fight faded, the chance to just slip into a hot bath in her room at the Pokemon Centre and relax for a couple of hours was so welcome.

As the afternoon wore on, she started browsing for places to eat. After a couple of idle searches, she flicked open a message window.

15:17 - Kirstin: So I was looking around for places to eat and I saw this cool place in near the cliff <Link>

15:18 – Kirstin: They do discounts for parties with more than two League contestants.

15:18 – Kirstin: Did you want to come get dinner with me?


15:19 – Lisa: Sure.

15:20 – Kirstin: Cool. They've got a table available for 7, if that's okay.

15:21 – Lisa: Sounds good 😀

15:21 – Kirstin: It's a date, then. Do you want to meet by the bike racecourse? It's just a couple minutes walk away.


A couple of minutes passed. She could see Lisa was still online. Maybe she was looking up where the racecourse was, but it surely couldn't take that much time?

"…oh." She'd just realised what she'd written.

15:25 – Kirstin: I don't mean a *date*, date, I just mean see you then.

15:25 – Lisa: <message deleted by user>

15:25 – Lisa: Yeah I relised that was what you meant.

15:25 – Lisa: *realised

15:27 – Lisa: Is anyone else coming?


15:28 – Kirstin: I was going to ask Lena and Sandra as well.

15:28 – Kirstin: Is that okay?


15:28 – Lisa: Of course! 😀


As she swapped over to ask if Lena and Sandra wanted to eat with them as well – being careful with her phrasing this time – she couldn't help but look back at that deleted message. Lisa had erased it so quickly after posting it that Kirstin hadn't even had the chance to see what it had actually been.

And there was a little part of her that couldn't help but wonder…if she'd doubled down on her mistake and actually asked Lisa out on a date…would she have said yes?

The restaurant Kirstin had found was definitely more expensive than she would've ever gone to outside the League, even with the discount. But they'd won enough Challenges that they all had a pretty decent amount of money available. It was often said that completing enough Challenges to get to and beat the first Gym would usually pay for League training, even with the interest rates on the League's loans. Kirstin had trained privately and her parents had paid for it anyway, but she would definitely have been able to pay them back if they asked, and then some.

She arrived a little early and snuck over to the restaurant to look at the menu – and reflected that in her jacket and jeans, she might have looked a little out of place. The dress code seemed more 'formal' than 'nightclub.' And it certainly didn't help that she was sure her unwilling dip in the Ambrette mud bath had leeched some of the colour out of her clothes.

Lisa arrived at the racecourse just at the same time as Kirstin got back there. She'd managed to find a pretty dress that went well with her wings, which she'd part-manifested to frame her back, and a necklace with a centre pearl that resonated with Essence, sparkling a beautiful lilac. "I wish I'd packed any nice clothes," Kirstin grumbled.

Lisa blushed slightly. "Oh, I just went to a charity shop," she admitted. "They had this for really cheap."

Kirstin blinked. If Lisa hadn't told her that she'd have estimated the outfit cost more than their meal was going to. Maybe it originally had.

"I had to take in the hem," Lisa added, "but…" She shrugged.

Lena hadn't quite managed Lisa's level of elegance, but the Skitty arrived in a dashing suit that still fitted in better with the restaurant's style than Kirstin's outfit. "I live just half an hour's walk away from here," she explained. "Me mam made me promise to take pictures of all the food before she ironed the suit for me, but…being a Cyllage native has its perks."

"Have you never eaten here?" Kirstin asked.

"Nah. I'm the only Pokemon in the family. It wouldn't be very fair for me to drag 'em all here."

"Letting your accent out for dinner too?" Lisa grinned.

"Well, when in Ludester…" Lena retorted. "Besides, we ain't on camera here. And I'm sure you two can keep a secret," she added, with a smirk.

Since Sandra had said she'd already booked a dinner table elsewhere, it was just the three of them as they made their way to the restaurant, scanning their Pokedexes so the wait staff could confirm that they were eligible for the 'Contestant Special.' They were a little surprised no-one recognised them, but then, none of them were dressed even remotely similar to how they dressed for the League – Lena was the closest, but since she was using her natural Cyllage accent rather than the one she put on for the League, no-one connected the dots. Kirstin realised belatedly that that was probably why she was doing it.

The restaurant served Essence-infused food, which meant for some very interesting dishes. Kirstin was particularly taken by the dessert she saw the people on the next table having, which appeared to be a sugary flower that periodically opened to release another glob of jelly for them to mix into the rest of their desserts. As she was watching the little sparkles that puffed out of it each time it opened, though, her attention was drawn to the TV in the corner. "Hey, I thought we weren't doing any challenges?"

The others looked over at the TV, then gathered around Lena's Pokedex as she synced it to the same channel. "Eurwen must be doing an advanced ally challenge," Lisa realised. They'd all joined Eurwen and Julian after he'd recruited Quacklin', but they'd seen little clips of it in recaps since then. "It's the only one you don't need Pokemon for."

"Pretty clever. We get to rest and recover our Essence and we still manage to win new Tokens. And a teammate."

"I don't know," Kirstin murmured quietly. "I feel kind of bad that she's doing that and we're here enjoying ourselves."

"Oh, please, look who's cheering Eurwen on." Lena tapped the golden-scarved figure in the background of the shot. "You really think she's not enjoying herself?"

"Hey…" There was an edge in Kirstin's tone. "Did Eurwen's Token count just go down?"

Cyr - Quilladin, Male, Overgrow, Naive, Capable of Taking Hits
Miro - Butterfree, Male, Compound Eyes, Naughty, Sturdy Body
Kirstin - Psyduck, Female, Damp, Docile, Alert to Sounds
Lena - Skitty, Female, Cute Charm, Impish, Impetuous and Silly
Einar - Charmeleon, Male, Blaze, Hardy, A Little Quick Tempered
Cory - Axew, Male, Mold Breaker, Serious, Good Perserverance
Shaw - Bunnelby, Male, Pickup, Relaxed, Somewhat Vain
Sam - Braixen, Male, Blaze, Lonely, Likes to Thrash About
Artie - Vivillon, Female, Shield Dust, Modest, Sturdy Body
Kamon - Panpour, Male, Gluttony, Relaxed, Loves to Eat
Quacklin' - Farfetch'd, Male, Keen Eye, Jolly, Alert to Sounds
Sandra - Roselia, Female, Natural Cure, Brave, Proud of its Power
Lisa - Flabebe, Female, Flower Veil, Quirky, Strong Willed
Lola - Azumarill, Female, Thick Fat, Quiet, Somewhat Vain
 

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