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Pokemon Snakewood - Dead 'Mon Walking

T

Turtleboi

Guest
  • Thread Starter Thread Starter
  • #41
I still vote for Zeta/Omicron!
 
D

DerogatoryTrainer

Guest
  • Thread Starter Thread Starter
  • #42


Route 110!

A chance for a new party member who will certainly be much loved throughout this ru-



...

So I killed it and forgot to take a screenshot.

It was a Minun so no real loss.

And that will have to do for the opening.


@Damage - Pepe just isn't enough to heal me anymore...

@Gaunt - Guess some people just like sadistically torturing me...

@Genesis - Bet he plays Call of Duty and says he bangs various mothers as well.

@NickCrash - It's just going to get more and more ridiculous until he gets his memory back. Which I heard he never does.

@Dragon116 - "I never give up. That's my ninja way" seriously though kill me please

@nepeta100 - I'll beat the Elite 4 anyway. But if there's an epilouge we won't be seeing it.

@Sejiren - Why it's common sense isn't it? Better activate that teleporter too! And the magic talking device!

@wedward45 - I don't think I'll ask the viewers next time...most of them are sadistic fuckers...but I'll think about it.

@Rapunzel - YOU DID THIS TO ME!!!! Oh god no...this is just going to destroy me in the end...

@QuietGuardian22 - It's only the 5th one? I THOUGHT I WAS ALMOST DONE! I'll try. Oh my god will I try.

@Turtleboi - No. I've already seen Alba Corbina's run so it wouldn't be blind. I prefer not knowing what I'm getting myself into...most of the time.







We could always try and find your brother?

Y'know. That objective we have no real reason to fulfill.

He's probably dead by now anyway.





Well that's new.




It's a weird place to put one before the zombies and demons showed up.

I mean Slateport is like 5 minutes down the road...

Eh...I don't care really.



Amazing!!!

A tree that can be chopped down?

Will wonders never cease?





This will probably be the last we see of the Goon sword.

I need that last team slot.



Well we got...whatever the hell this thing is.



We're all very intimidated by you sir.

Now kindly turn to ash.



Who's this "Player" guy?





Yeah I have a question that I'm sure the game will answer for me but why do the chef zombies flee?

Shouldn't they turn into dust like the rest?

Or are they going to try a "all our powers combined" thing on me later?





...





Hey! I wonder what's up here?



Nuthin' that's what.



Although there is a waterfall that somebody could accidentally surf down, realize he hadn't saved in ages and be forced to swim all the way back around.

Hypothetically obviously.







Oh come on man...

You couldn't handle two little girls?

...

Actually one little girl and her crossdressing brother?

(Why did they make that change?)



Charmeworm and Shrivelsaur...

I'd ask why so many trainers have Kanto starters in Hoenn buuuut...




I don't really care.



ElectaBUGS?

...

The creativity this game shows some times...is just PHENOMENAL.




Anyway I won handily enough.

Be pretty pathetic to wipe here after all



Hahahahaha!



What kind of death rattle is that???

It's like a retarded chicken!

Just imagine being on your deathbed, surrounded by your family...you begin to drift off...and then...



I'm totally doing that when I die.

Put it on my grave even.






Well you would have died.

Possibly with a stupid noise.







So...uh...my reward?






You'd think that would merit a TM or something wouldn't you?

But I guess we have to do this the funhard way



Wallet and Phone please sir.

You can keep any Pokemon you have.

They'd just reek of ingratitude.






















No.

I want to finish this quest so I can move on with my life.



Also your parents were jerks to name you that.





But hey you helped my Magnemite evolve so you get a free pass!




And now his nickname makes no sense!



Sorry but I think the Name Rater is dead so I guess you'll just have to deal with it.

Like I have to deal with this game.





Aww nice to know some one cares...



Fucking weirdo...





Obligatory "Nobody ever expects the Spanish Inquisition" joke.

Also WHAT THE FUCK IS THE INQUISITION?



Clearly they're a fucking joke if they use Hombones.








You do that sweetheart.



Isn't that the Charizard I couldn't steal in Verdanturf?





Well.



They all use fucking Hombones then.

GREAT.




At least Fisty evolved



Well this guy isn't chickenshit apparently...



If only the world worked like that Dero...

If only...




You realize how retarded that sounds out of context right?

Hell it sounds retarded IN context.



And fuck off.



Aw yeah Mauville city.

This place was really cool in the 3ds version where it became a fucking shopping centre.

I mean it was weird but still cool.




...

And that, dear viewers, sums up this game entirely.





Live by the Mart, Die by the Mart.






Okaaaaayyy...I take that back.

You're a weirdo.





And speaking of weirdos...



Hi Gleis.






Oh god...

The mediocrity...it's...too powerful...







And people were okay with having a branch of government called "The Inqusition"?

And they seem to be missing 4 towns in their "complete" control of the region.








It's not exactly an impressive feat to be in control of this fight.

They seem to be fighting the only zombies i've seen that use Zigzagoons.







I refuse.

I refuse to react to this flash of light.













What a shitty choice in personal slave...I mean zombies?

Seriously?

although it worries me what Gleis means by "personal" slaves...




Again Dero demonstrates that his "amnesia" is extremely selective.









Well...he did brutally murder a bunch of zombies...

But it was very over the top for someone in a rush...

Maybe he was trying to fool me or something?

I just don't trust the guy.






Oh boy.

Another side-quest.






It's a yes or no question Gleis.

Not a "hey that's great now do what I want" kind of question.



Uhhh thank for escorting me to the entrance but I want to check out the other routes.






SO???

Not like that gives him omniscience Dero!



Fucking hell...so gullible...









Yeah?

Well I think they were hiding from the ravenous zombies trying to eat them.

I mean this place is actually a good place for it. Unlike Slateport and their "food shield"









Oh?

Do I get to solve a murder mystery then?

That might be fun...maybe...








...

So if no one enters or exits...how did Gleis know about the murder?

Anyone?




Ugh...stop being enthusiastic please...

It hurts my brain...









Ehhhhh he's strong sure but clearly not the sharpest tool in the shed...

Also how does any of that qualify me to help solve a murder?







So basically do ALL the actual police work and then you swoop in an claim all the credit?

How about you go fu-





GUESS WE'RE DOING IT THEN!

NOT LIKE I HAVE A CHOICE RIGHT?







"So says Gleis, Lord and Master of all things Gliesy."



Also solving one murder won't help Hoenn in any way so yet again Gleis is full of it.



You...realize that Dero being here already answers that question right?



Whoop-de-doo.




...

Fucking hell everyone in this region is retarded.





Uhhhhh good for him?

But hey Wattsons here so maybe I can have a battle with a legitimate leader?



You're like...six.



I however, am not.

*lick*



UGH.

Taste like saliva...



Guess this is the body?






And you just left them there?

In the middle of a crime scene?

Ugh...






It could also be a Pokemon that knows Fire moves?

Or an electric type attack...those can leave burns too...

I swear if this was all due to a fucking Voltorb...




Well you weren't any help.







Something YOU the police officer could have found out.

Hell even Birch could have figured that out.







I mean you could always investigate yourself right?

Noooo I'm sure leaving it up to a 16 year old possessed by a creepy old man is the better option right?





BACK DEMON!

THIS PEPPER SPRAY SHOULD WARD YOU OFF!

IT'S TECHNICALLY FOOD!







SEE THAT?

Someone thinks I'm nice!

The day is looking brighter already!





Why are you whispering to the side?

You usually just announce what to do next most of the time...







J'accuse!





...

This place is underground.

Literally everywhere has lights.

Why didn't you turn them on huh?







What kind of game do you think you're playing pal?



I'll see that you hang for this.




I'm watching you scum.



You mean did I do your job?

Yes.









Wait...that's just complete speculation!

And why would you think it was a Charmeleon?

All the chefs we've met used Munchlax and Kirlia!







NO!

That is in no way "Trainer Knowledge"!

He's just fucking guessing.



And WHY do I have to ask Wattson when you believe me and can arrest the chef?

I mean I don't think he did it anymore because of Dero's idiot deductions.

...Let's just go talk to Wattson...






That isn't really a great motive...





WHAT?!?







A disease.



A disease that SPECIFICALLY affects chefs?

Okay that's it.

I know who did it. Even if he's innocent I still want to hang him for such a stupid theory.






Nope.

Wattson.

100% sure of it.







He's also a fucking idiot.

Let's not forget that.














Yeah now I'm confused...what would that have anything to do with it?




Okay...




Magnets? Zap plates?



...



...



That is literally the most retarded thing I have ever heard in my entire life.

I fucking hate this game










...you are the worst fucking cop ever...



GUESS I'LL JUST GO FIGHT A MURDERER WITH A 16 YEAR OLD BOY THEN!

SOUNDS LIKE A GOOD PLAN HUH??

LET'S GO THEN!






























Fucking hell Dero...

Not a big fan of subtlety are you?













Then what the FUCK was that shit about Electrichoney?







HOLY SHIT!

THAT THING IS GOING TO...DESTROY...



...us...

...which would end the game...

...



GO LUXRAY!

KILL US PLEASE!






...

So I beat a Level 100 Luxray with a bunch of level 20 Pokemon...

Isn't that just...GREAT!?!



Ugh...as much as I want to end it right here and now...



We did manage to beat a level 100 Pokemon despite being woefully outmatched.




And seeing as it was a scripted battle...



I guess we'll keep on keeping on!

Something I'm sure I'll regret...


























BUTTON!



ME PUSH.






Despite that not really making sense.

Does he just charge them with a cable or something?









WEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHE

Shut the fuck up already.






Oh come on...it fucking de-evolved?

How does that make any bit of sense?






Well...let the slaughter commence I guess...





No challenge at all.





RAIWHAT?!?!?





Come on Fisty!

It's only 6 levels higher! You can take that!



BAD PLAN BAD PLAN



Great it knows Roar that's gonna be annoying.




VERY ANNOYING HOLY SHIET



But luckily Leech Seed and Mega Drain is the second best grass combo ever.



And Hitmontree beats Raikou with naught but a scratch.



And it looks like we can get back to the slaughter now!






Very possible.

Without that legendary you wouldn't have even made it past Fisty.




Ah well I've stopped caring a while ago.

I should've just quit.






Who the fuck is this then?

Do I have somebody doing a reactionlocke of my reactionlocke?










...



...



I guess that's it then?

Well better get back on the search so...

Till next time...
 

wedward45

The thinking chaotic neutral
Pokédex No.
537
Caught
Jul 18, 2019
Messages
31
Location
The Realm of Discord
Nature
Impish
Pronouns
He/Him
Pokémon Type
Dragon, Fairy
Pokédex Entry
Hates conflict and negativity. Snarks too much for its own good.
Oh, my god, this fucking game...

Well...

Look on the bright side!
 
T

Turtleboi

Guest
  • Thread Starter Thread Starter
  • #44


This game's boundless imagination just LEAPS off the screen doesn't it. I bet you wished you were playing Reborn again were you.
 
D

Desco

Guest
  • Thread Starter Thread Starter
  • #45
How horrible and stupid and bad writen was that? I can't really tell.
 

Drymus

Conqueror of the Pewter Gym
Pokédex No.
167
Caught
Jun 30, 2019
Messages
6
Pokémon Type
Fire, Psychic
Wattson down!

Beware.

It's coming.

The absolute stupid to end all stupid.

This is why you don't do polls...
 
D

DerogatoryTrainer

Guest
  • Thread Starter Thread Starter
  • #47


Hey gang! Been a while since we were here eh?

Hope you're ready for another fun filled adventure in Pokemon Snakewood!



I know I am!


@wedward45 - There is no bright side. Only darkness.

@Turtleboi - This game almost makes me miss Radomus. Almost. But it's a very close Almost.

@Desco - You just have to remember that Wattson needed Electrichoney to power up his electric Pokemon's attacks
Even though they were already powered up by the generator. Rendering the Electrichoney deduction fucking pointless

@Drymus - The Boardroom I bet. I'll quit if it's that bad. I swear to god I will.

@NickCrash - NickCrash.exe has stopped working. You could say it NickCrash-ed.

@Gaunt - I should have. Dear god I should have.

@Genesis - Just gotta wait for the call from Sesame street...

@Despair Syndrome - God no I will not keep it up. I'm going to try and sink this ship with all I've got.

@Dragon116 - Nah man not a fan of slow self-harm. I'm going to blow my head off immediately.

@laggless01 - That sounds like far too much effort for something so bad. I don't care they all suck in my opinion. Thanks I got "lucky"

@Damage - ...Well okay then...

@nepeta100 - I literally have a headache while I write these episodes.

@DerogatoryTrainer - This is the only fun you get from doing this series.


At least now we can explore Mauville after...whatever the hell that thing with Wattson was.






The employees in this game are extremely devoted to their minimum wage jobs aren't they?





Okay I take that back.

Rydel's a lazy fuck apparently.

Or he's dead.

No matter though I'm still getting that bike!



HNNNNNNNNNRRRRRRRGGGHHHHHHH!!!



WHO THE HELL NAILS BIKES DOWN???

Gah forget it.



Wattson might have left something in his gym before the zombozos showed up...








Care to hand them over?







Gleis got captured?



...



I don't really care?

All I ever do when he's around is wait for the knife in my back.

He's very suspicious.



Hombones are so weak it's not even funny...



Well that's new anyway...




Shame about it's death though.






Alright Dero calm down.

It's not like he's a useful ally or anything.

I mean he fucking gets captured by these Inquisition retards?

Pathetic.





















Well at least we know where the bad guys are now.

Also why did this get renamed already?

How long has this invasion been going on?






Oh is that like a bag upgrade?

And how does that allow him to keep more Pokemon?

These balls are tiny...I could fit like 10 of them in my coat pockets alone...



Anyway I needed Rock Smash to progress so it's back to "civilization"























I tell ya the service in this town is awful.





I wonder if there's any loot to be had here...

Did Hoenn Game Corners ever offer Pokemon as prizes?

I can't remember...



Well this place is a bust.

Moving on.




















So if they cowered in fear you would have killed them outright?

...

I'd probably do the same...



Yeah yeah keep using your stock zombie moans.

They can't hold a candle to "Clurk!"





"Poliworm"?

They aren't even trying anymore...

And why is it all Kanto Pokemon anyway?

WE'RE IN HOENN!



Burn in hell kids.



And amazingly it DIDN'T attack me.





You sure you don't mean to scream "KIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!" at me?



Ah well another easy win~






...



WHAT?!?!?





I have no fucking idea.

Apparently I cured you by beating you

Even though that never happened with any other chef until now...

MAKES PERFECT SENSE I GUESS!!!



God I hate this game.

It's shit like this that makes it hard to update this run.

I just don't care about anything that happens because it's all retarded to the highest degree





DAMMIT!



Fucking didn't even attack once and then it just blows Peanuts away?

Fucking Gardevoirs...



Sorry Peanuts.

But I really couldn't give a shit about you.

You ain't no Hitmontree.



And then there's this thing.

I suppose I might as well evolve it out of egg form.



Well that was quick.



Now listen you little shit you better not pull anything funn-



-y...



...

It evolved into a slightly bigger egg

...

heh



Hahaha...



HAHAHAHAHAHAHA...



AHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAAHAAHAAHAAAAAAA



























Okay what the fuck.

This is the same god-damn route as the cured chefs.

WHY IS THIS GUY DIFFERENT!?!

THIS FUCKING GAGAHGUIHUIFHSUIFHSAI


















Okay I found out where I have to go now.



This teeny tiny island...



That apparently has a whole fucking forest on it holy shit






Hmmmmm...to maim or not to maim...

Eh I'm too lazy to put actual effort into stabbing you so I'll move on and see what this island of calm has in the way of Pokemon...



Ennngghh...



Alright...better than nothing anyway

but level 28 really?



A name sure to wear out in two bloody levels...



Never.




Oh.



Well...I wonder who that could be...

Also please don't read too deep into the premise of this show.

Which is basically me inside a 16 year old...

*shivers*




Imma steal those berries.





Hey hey hey hold up!

Is that a free Chikorita!?!?





DEM'S FIGHTING WORDS YOU LITTLE TWIG!



...



...



































this fucking game


























Oh good.

Glad to know I got a Weedle instead of a Ralts.



Well let's get to the end of this already

The Idiot-ometer is dangerously high today...







Wasn't that a lovely interaction viewers?

He goes from fear to despair and faux bravado in the space of 20 seconds

Now let's see how his "superiors" measure up...





There seems to be a whole network of caves here...

Best get exploring!

I mean I'd rather not but I have to hurry up and finish this run so I can go to therapy for it.














So it appears Team Aqua is in this farce of a game too...




Oh jesus christ what is this now?






There is very little battles in this episode worth showing.

Except from the Gardevoir it's been too easy





You know a lot of trainers use that "caught me by surprise" excuse...

But the player character never challenges an opponent outside of League matches

So to sum up. Everyone is beneath me.




Hah?

This isn't where I came in...





WHAT



DID



I



FUCKING



SAY?!?!?!



And now the tunnel led me back out here...





That's fucking annoying...



Found another one of the "Deadly" Seven...




...





YAAAAAAWWWWNNNNNNN

Man these guys are weaker than weak...

5 more to go...






USELESS PIECE OF SHIT!



Ohhhh I see...

I get brought out here everytime I beat a Deadly Seven?



NOT LIKE THAT'S EXTREMELY AGGRAVATING!

NOT EVEN A LITTLE!

NOPE!



Okay I just need to get through this with my sanity intact and I won't have to deal with this game for another month...



OH GOD!



What the fuck is that thing?

It's got a bloody human head!

Ugly little shit...


Haha I get it...Island of Calm is meant to be a joke right?



HA

HA

HA



Huh...double doored cave...




Please stop me.

Just let me die so I can be free...



One day I'll find someone able to kill me...



Oh a dead end with no item...

Better turn ba-





...



*inhale*



Moving on...





DerogatoryTrainerdisapproves

DerogatoryTrainerfinds it scandalous to refer to oneself in the third person




I bet it's going to be really tedious just like all these off-screen battles have been...




...



That is NOT a fucking secret.

That's basic security.

I fucking hate this place.



Oh look an item I'll never get cause my bag is a piece of shit.

Yaaaaayyy~



Finally...the boss man...



...



Oh well please continue.

Must be easy to get inspiration on this island.

Y'know...



THE ISLAND OF FUCKING CALM?!?!?!?!




















THANK YOU DERO!

See? Even he hates this place!

I'm 100% justified in my hatred now!







Oh Dero...I'm so glad we're on the same page...





Oh jesus what the hell is this retarded cow doing here?







Oh look!

Re-used dialogue!

Make a wish everyone!








...

This game WILL drive me to suicide.

I am 100% certain.



Hnnnnn...



Let's see if the Haiku guy is done so I can rend his flesh from his bones...







Great introduction mate.

That "Boo" really caught me off-guard.

No I have no chance of winning.





That one pokemon he had really tested Dero's abilities as a trainer.






Well at least this attempt to destroy my brain cells is over...





Time to get the fuck out of here.






...

...

motherfucker



Maybe it'll kill me!




No such luck...






So what makes it different from all those non-government approved ones?



Fuck it I don't care.

I just want the sweet release of death already...



...

Well this is different






Oh god...I remember someone mentioning this...

So I'm immediately on my guard...



And then this happened.






...

I'd feel more sad if it was any other Pokemon...

But Silencer lost to a Hombone so all I feel is disappointment.





Pff...I scoff in the face of your security system!





SCOFFING!

PROTECT ME!



Well...





This is going to be annoying...





Very annoying...



Hold the phone...did I find the way through?



Nope...



Right.

I'm going to call it here.

I've reached my stupidity limit for the month/year/decade/century/era.

So I'll see you guys next time.

Hopefully it won't be as bad

...

Ohhhh it's just going to get worse isn't it?



 

wedward45

The thinking chaotic neutral
Pokédex No.
537
Caught
Jul 18, 2019
Messages
31
Location
The Realm of Discord
Nature
Impish
Pronouns
He/Him
Pokémon Type
Dragon, Fairy
Pokédex Entry
Hates conflict and negativity. Snarks too much for its own good.
Derogatory, I've got a plan to punish the guy who made this hack. It involves a hungry doberman, super-concentrated caffeine, Sonic '06, and lots and lots of duct tape. Interested in helping?
 

Drymus

Conqueror of the Pewter Gym
Pokédex No.
167
Caught
Jun 30, 2019
Messages
6
Pokémon Type
Fire, Psychic
How to deal with the Island of Calm:
1) Breathe In
2) Breathe Out
3) Hit the little 'x' in the top-right corner
4) Move the game file to the recycling bin
5) Empty the recycling bin
6) Download and delete thousands of Gigabytes of data to make sure the file is truly gone
7) Be happy
 
D

Desco

Guest
  • Thread Starter Thread Starter
  • #50
Can I laugh about your misery? Just a little.
 
T

Turtleboi

Guest
  • Thread Starter Thread Starter
  • #51


Why... Just WHY?!

This game is just... I don't even...

 

No-name

Conqueror of the Fuchsia Gym
Pokédex No.
603
Caught
Jul 31, 2019
Messages
46
Location
Nowhere significant
Nature
Serious
When is new Snakewood coming out? Which I enjoy because I'm a complete sadist.  At least finish It ASAP so you don't have to deal with It in the future.
 

No-name

Conqueror of the Fuchsia Gym
Pokédex No.
603
Caught
Jul 31, 2019
Messages
46
Location
Nowhere significant
Nature
Serious
I wonder when (NOT if) this run gets linked to Deragatory Trainer's account. I want to see this reach the end of the game.
 

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