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Written Story Alola General Don't Fear The Reaper

Thread Description
Death goes on a vacation in Alola. They get a Rowlet.

Thirteenth

Number XIV
Writer
Pokédex No.
14
Caught
May 20, 2019
Messages
171
Nature
Quiet
Pronouns
She/Her
Pokémon Type
Fairy, Ice
Pokédex Entry
The reason she guides people all the way down to the mountain's base is that she wants them to hurry up and leave.
Hau is excitable, I adore him.

And poor Kane and his identity crises ;;

LMAO Death's victory

Hala's so done for every one of these battles lol Dude just wants to go home and take a nap. I really appreciate how much thought Hau puts into his battle compared to the other two, analyzing how Hanna and Mankey move around each other and looking for ways to manipulate the environment. (We see a little of the former with Lillie too. And Death, well.) He's definitely grown up with it. And then you end it on a bittersweet note ;A; Hauuu. Leave him alone, War...
 
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Reactions: Dee

cyndakip

there goes my luck
🌱Featurer
Writer
Team Alpha
Pokédex No.
23
Caught
Jun 9, 2019
Messages
332
Location
Lilycove City
Nature
Hardy
Pronouns
they/she
Pokémon Type
Fire, Water
Pokédex Entry
Part Cyndaquil, part Mudkip, entirely tired.
"Yeah, okay," Kāne says, "but you're like, Death. I'm just some dude, how come I could see the Tapu?"

"Maybe cause you're dead?" Hau offers.

"Gee, thanks."

(Great, awesome, wonderful, great, Kāne loves these little reminders that he’s dead, he’s a Pokemon, he’s neither alive nor himself-)
Stop giving me all these feels about Kāne! ...That very much applies to the previous chapter, too, which I absolutely loved.

Hau whoops.

"Hau, this is a place of sacred business."

"Oh, sorry. I thought it was the place where I was gonna kick your butt."

“Hau.”

“Sorry.”
I love Hau so much oh my god

Death winning by default is hilarious. I love it.

Lillie's up next.

She's only shaking a little. She's put up her hair today, in a neat braid under her trademark sun hat. Burnet had done it up for her this morning, while Kukui made breakfast.

"You can do this, Lillie," Burnet had assured her.

Now, looking at Sammie on the battlefield, Lillie almost believes her.
Believe her, Lillie! And believe in yourself! You can do it!

...Wow, that was easy. Good for her!

After all that, I'm glad that Hau and Hala got to have a good exciting fight! That was a lot of fun.

(And this is how Hau beats his grandfather in their official match; without fanfare or fuss or fanatics.

He lies awake that night, staring at the ceiling, and wonders why he feels so empty.)
...Until you went and did that. Can you not? Thanks.
 

Missy

i left my heart in alola
Writer
Pokédex No.
94
Caught
Jun 16, 2019
Messages
90
Nature
Lax
Pokémon Type
Fairy, Tough
Pokédex Entry
just missy now
There's a lot I could say about this run.... so I will!

It's got a clear, concise premise. Nothing too fancy. Death is here and they're making up card games. I do actually have the urge to make Beanstalk a thing. I don't know how that would work but I feel like it would be fun.

Also the jokes are legitimately funny most of the time, and I'm usually not tickled by comedy writing but you've got some genuinely clever punchlines, which I've already yelled at you about so.... yeah.

Finally, this is my favourite Lillie characterization ever. You do her really well. I'm usually not a huge fan of her but I like her here. I also love Hau. I love these kids.
 

localhoney

-free as all the pretty horses in our dreams-
Writer
Team Omega
Pokédex No.
2002
Caught
May 17, 2020
Messages
56
Location
Miami, FL
Nature
Adamant
Pronouns
he/him
Pokémon Type
Electric, Poison
Pokédex Entry
Localhoney, the Sweet Toxin Pokemon. It's said that the sounds it emits can paralyze even a Gigantamax Grimmsnarl.
I love this so much. I especially love all the simultaneous inner conflicts going on with Hau, Lillie and Kane and I'm excited to see them evolve and find their answers, whether or not they're the ones they want. The punchlines in this are very funny, I've actually chuckled out loud at some of 'em which is more than I can ask for from a fic past exhaling through my nose.

I think the comedic, concise premise of the run is what lends more gravity to the somber moments. The graveyard scene, Kane's being a ghost, Hau feeling empty after beating his grandfather (which hurt my heart by the way). Really enjoying this and ready for more!
 

Metafiction

Fourth Wall Demolitions Expert
Writer
Team Alpha
Pokédex No.
237
Caught
Jul 1, 2019
Messages
27
Location
The depths of the nearest salt mine
Nature
Hasty
Pronouns
he/him/his
Pokémon Type
Water, Ground
Pokédex Entry
Writes in bursts of inspiration, followed by long lapses of inactivity. It reacts with sarcasm when provoked.
There are so many things to like about this run that it would literally be easier to list things about it that I don't like--and that's the easiest job in the world, because the only item on that list is that there isn't enough of it.

Seriously, for a comedic run--and make no mistake, the comedy here is absolutely on point, between Death's eccentric observations about the world around them, Kāne's inimitable snark, and a whole host of little gags that keep the tone wonderfully light--there's so much depth to these characters that really makes everything feel so much bigger. Lillie of course is the star of the show in this regard, as she's already showing serious signs of development, but I'm also a huge fan of how you've managed to take Death--like, literal, actual, fourth horseman, capital "d" Death--and turn them into an introspective and relaxed, if enigmatic, genuine protagonist in all of this. That just blows my mind.

Anyway yeah, really liking this! Can't wait for more.
 

Squiggy Azalea

big chungus pls DM me 😳
Moderator
🎇Contributor
Screenshotter
Team Omega
Pokédex No.
15
Caught
May 20, 2019
Messages
328
Location
italy
Nature
Jolly
Pronouns
He/they
Pokémon Type
Electric, Tough
Pokédex Entry
pizza pasta mamma mia
omg I absolutely adore this run so much
first of all it's VERY FUNNY and I love that, your comedy is great and death is an excellent protagonist and absolutely hilarious with their personality, and overall i'm just a huge fan of your characters, they're all very interesting!!!
honestly i cannot wait to see more of this run as it unfolds, i'm very ecstatic 👀
 

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