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Screenshot Johto Teen Commentary Dear God Help Me - A HeartGold Nuzlocke

Thread Description
In which I nuzlocke for the first time in, like, 5 and a half years.


3 Time Video Game Champion
Pokédex No.
Oct 11, 2019
Under a rock
Pokémon Type
Fairy, Ice
Pokédex Entry
Fair Warning: I have no idea what I am doing.
Hoo boy, I haven't done one of these in a long time, and I never finished any in the first place. Let's dive right in, shall we?
  1. Just Like Fire Emblem - Faint = death.
  2. Limited Supply - Can only catch the first encounter per area.
    • Dupes Clause - Dupes don't count. De/evolved forms count if I never obtained them.
    • Ball Clause - Rule 2 only applies once I get Pokeballs.
    • Gift Clause - Gift Pokemon are free.
    • Shiny Clause - Shinies can be caught no matter what.
    • HM Clause - If I need an HM for progression but have no way to teach it to anything, I may catch something to use it, but they cannot be used in battle and must be returned to the box ASAP.
  3. My Greatest Enemy - All Pokemon must be nicknamed, no matter how ridiculous.
  4. Set in Stone - Battle Style must be set to Set.
  5. Help Is Not Coming - Legendaries can not be caught. All legendaries must be found and defeated. If a legendary is available to fight, it must be fought before progressing further. Roaming legendaries are the exception, but they must be beaten before finishing the league/postgame.
    • Wailicanth Clause - If extraneous circumstances keep us from reaching a legendary, it is safe from our wrath (In this case, Rayquaza and Latios.).
  6. Whyyyyyyyyyyyyy!? - The run ends when I beat Red and clear Rule #5. Yes, I know this means the last fight will be against Kyogre and not Red. Fight me.
  1. Why Am I Doing This to Myself?

Aw yeah, HeartGold time. I never actually played this one much growing up. I had SoulSilver instead as a kid, and I kinda regret that a bit if only 'cuz HeartGold has better build-up to its mascot legendary.

Yep, yep, we all know the shpeel by now. Get Pokemon, fight Pokemon, love Pokemon.

And now, here I am, walking right to my doom with a smile on my face.

You don't know the half of it, Oak. I might just get my ass kicked. Anyways, let's just get started and grab the...

Ah. I forgot that this is, like, the only game that doesn't give you a free PC Potion.

Now let's actually get started...

...just as soon as I set my options.

Yeah, we'll take Totodile. I've always had a soft spot for the little gremlin. What to call it, though...?

Perfect. You guys should probably get used to these shenanigans. They ain't goin' anywhere.

I, uh... I don't think that's a good nature, though... :sweatdrop:

Oh hey, that explains th-

OH HEY, THANKS! Somehow, I feel like I'm gonna run out kinda quick, though.

Quick detour! Pokegear get!

And now with the objectively best skin selected. Anyways, onw-

Just as soon as we get the professor's number!

First encounter's makin' me wish I had pokeballs already... I love Furret!

And then we cut things just a teensy bit close right before town 'cuz who doesn't like livin' on the edge?

Yeah, yeah, rub it in... Let's just get this over with so I can finally R U N .

Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh, that feels so much better!

Gonna stock up a bit, might need these. Totally won't regret buying more potions.

Uh, sorry, pops, that's a no-can-do from me. This is a C H A L L E N G E R U N .

That, though. That, I can do. Now, onwards to adv-

Huh. Y'know, I totally forgot this was a Pokegear thing. Anyways, on with the plot!

Taking bets now: How many apricorns do you think I'm gonna have by the end of this? 'Cuz I'm definitely forgetting about Kurt like I always do.

God, I feel kinda bad for this guy, just havin' a road sign casually pointing out his house. Probably has to deal with a lotta salesmen.

Ooh, leveled up right outside. Look at Al, he looks so happy about it!

Yep, let's heal the singular health I'm missing. (I totally didn't miss screenshotting getting the egg, nosiree, not at all.)

I mean, that really probably depends on who you ask.

But it's a challenge ruuuuuuuuuuuuuuun!

And there's another professor's number I'll probably never need.

Real descriptive, Elm. Either a pokemon's been stolen, or the printer's leaking ink.

Anyways, rival time. He's a prick.

God, I forgot how good Silver's theme was. Absolute bop! :partytime:

Anyways, he really stood no chance. Have fun fighting the league with a Chikorita! Johto ain't kind to it.

I think you gotta beat me for that first, bucko.

Is that a problem... binch?

I hear this so much, but what kind of criminal returns to the scene of the crime!? That's so dumb!

Anyways, the boy's name...?

Totally his real name, 100%, absolutely. Stick up wanted posters everywhere with it, it's definitely real.

Anyways, yeet! Here's your egg, Elm. Now fix that printer.

Quick detour now to set up some mom care packages. We may need 'em.

And now the meat of the run can begin! It's catchin' time!

First up! A teeny tiny little Rattata! We're gonna try and go far, kid. Let's go!

Totally forgot to screenie the nickname screen AND the nature, whoops. It's Lonely, by the way, which I think is good for a Rattata.

Next up! An adorable little Caterpie! Not my favorite early game bug - that would be Grubbin - but still a really nice one.

I named him Wormy 'cuz he's gonna be a horrifying monster one day, especially with that nature.

And now it's time for good ol' Youngster Joey...

...who is very definitely out for blood! :ohdear:

Don't worry, though, I won, no sweat.

Youngster Mikey is nowhere near as much of a heart attack, thankfully.

AND SPEAKING OF HEART ATTACKS! Wormy is very squishy right now! Leveling him is going to suck.

Squeak got Focus Energy, though, so that's good! God, I really should've called her Squeaks, though. I keep saying and typing that.

Anyways, next up is a Bellsprout. I don't think I've ever used one of these.

Pretty sure that's the worst nature for a Bellsprout, though... :sweatdrop:

I totally mistook this for the Vs. Seeker first and got really excited for a good five seconds before getting kinda disappointed. Also, I remembered later that the Vs. Seeker was baked into the Pokegear anyways.

Absolutely! Tbh, I'd love to sing and perform like that, but I don't have the lung capacity to sing whole songs without running out of breath nor the memory to remember whole songs and/or dance routines.

Anyways, backtracking to the Dark Cave now that I'm healed.

It's not just a boulder... It's a rock!

And now the team's all caught up (and we got a Metapod)!

And now it's Sprout Tower time. Lemme just wind my watch forwards a bit and...

There we go!

Pretty alright Gastly, I think. I then proceeded to take a break and got distracted for a good while longer, so turning the clock forwards became a very moot point.

On a side note, this monk has something that's not a Bellsprout! Genuinely surprised me.

Lemme know how that works out for ya, Binch.

Anyways, I totally forgot he was an actual boss to fight, so whoops! Kinda regretting not buying more potions.

This was really dumb.

This was less dumb.

And this was a heart attack and a half. Took the combined efforts of Inky, Wormy, and Ivy to beat this one 'cuz my whole team was either weak to grass or at half health, and that was my very last Vine Whip. Bellsprouts are kinda scary, actually.

At least Pioneer got a level, despite doing literally nothing to it.

Oh right, it's a TM in this game...

Anyways, here's the team! Next time, we go beat up Falkner, maybe get some more levels first, and press on southward.

Bonus Content!

I'm not really sure how, but I definitely managed to break something when I first got here. Had to reload my save to fix it. Also, you can't really see it here, but as I walked, I was constantly flipping forwards and backwards. These screenies do not do this justice.


Conqueror of the Pewter Gym
Pokédex No.
Oct 11, 2019
she/her, they/them
Pokémon Type
Water, Ghost
extremely HGSS but also very solid looking team. Pioneer is gonna carry you far through the early game. that -def nature rattata scares me though D:

have fun with grinding, i remember it being really slow here. :)

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